Action Character Icon – Check.
Fantastic actress and stunning to look at – Check
Big Budget – Check
Total turkey – CHECK!!
This was a disappointment, but was it ever going to be good? None of the other Lara Croft movies were. However, being a fan of Alicia Vikander from seeing her in Deux Machina and also The Man from Uncle I thought I would give Tomb Raider a whirl.
The movie was dull, it really was. The opening dialogue was from an era gone by, where the narrator sets the premise, then the two action scenes? Like why bother. They started with a very average fight scene in the ring. The only thing impressive there was Alicia’s abs!! OMG.
In the workout pic above, she looks strong but looking at her in the movie I thought she got too lean, as she looked slightly refugee campee…..emaciated….
The second action scene was cycle chase? There was zero reason for it. They might as well have filmed her going for a jog in the morning. In all honesty, they could have opened the movie with Lara in the building discussing her inheritance, cut out both action scenes out and have Lara dropped into a mystery. Wrap some dialogue in to provide context and away you go. Have the audience asking questions, instead of shoving answers down your throat continuously.
The first two action scenes were boring and unnecessary, the third was there to move the story along, but it was distinctively below average. It was a running, jumping scene around the docks of Hong Kong with three young thugs. However these three thugs looked about 14, even scrawnier then Alicia and about two inches shorter, with zero athleticism. How can there be any tension when you’re not concerned for the lead character? Of all the HK stunt people they could have got, they could only rustle up three high schoolers? And why did they pick such timid looking actors? Alicia looks she could have whooped their asses with her hands tied behind her back.
Now this next bit is a somewhat harsh but it really bothered me, I will admit I never noticed it before in the other movies that I have seen her in. But for some reason, her right eye was all over the shop, I never knew she had a lazy eye. It really distracted me.
With the physical criticism out of the way, I have to add that Alicia doesn’t have the charisma to carry this main lead. It needed someone with more pizazz. With the other movies that I had seen her in, as great as she was in them, she was not the main lead, she was a supporting actress, and I think certainly for action movies that where her strength is. Don’t get me wrong, you can tell she is a dedicated actress, starting with the body transformation, but in the end not even an eight pack could save this movie.
I am sorry to say this film failed in pretty much everywhere. The story was clumsy and obvious, I could literally write the plot line as I went along. Oh, maybe Lara will bump in her father on the island for an emotional reunion? Of course he hadn’t died….
But of course he needed to die in the end to add emotional impact, and of course it didn’t generate any…..sigh…
The acting wasn’t terrible, just bad. The main thing that let it down was the story, far too linear and straight forward, they literally lifted it out of the action movie/game template. But what could have made a difference was the action element.
Unfortunately the action was behind the times, maybe if this movie had come out 10 years ago, people might have been wowed. Take the fallen plane in the rapids scene for example, any gamer would have noticed something similar from the Uncharted series, and it was done better there!
Viewer and fans of Alicia, forget this movie and go watch something else. Like I did – Black Mirror’s Bandersnatch. Or go play the game.